Firkin - Seven drunken nights

As I went down on a Monday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a horse outside the door where my old horse should be
And I called my wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that horse outside the door where my old horse should be?

refr.
Ah, you're drunk,
you're drunk you silly old fool,
still you cannot see
That's a lovely sow that my mother sent to me
Well, there’s many a days I've travelled a hundred miles or more
But a saddle on a sow sure I never saw before

As I went home on Tuesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that coat behind the door where my old coat should be?

As I went home on Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that pipe up on the chair where my old pipe should be

And as I went home on Thursday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be

As I went home on Friday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be
And I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be

As I went home on Saturday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two hands upon her breasts where my old hands should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns them hands upon your breasts where my old hands should be

As I went home on a Sunday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a thing inside her thing where my old thing should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that thing inside your thing where my old thing should be